politely not mentioning that it is completely nonsensical to say "happy yom kippur"

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patiently explaining to text canvassers that i am not willing to help them on high holidays

ph ( ~ ) 

i ran out of needles for HRT & have to use what my pharmacy was able to provide me. they're lower gauge than i use & .... fuck it hurts. it's a good reminder of how things used to be before i stood up to my providers & said my agony was unnecessary & cruel

ph ( - ) 

damn it. i've had so many needles in my body this week


my therapist is a religious catholic. she's very supportive of me as a religious jew & sometimes asks questions to clarify her understanding of where i'm coming from. but i don't always know if it's safe for me to say i think we've slipped onto a fascist slope as a nation. i don't always know whether it's safe to share all parts of me

also it seems i'm sleeping in the garden. maybe the cars going by will soothe me to sleep

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i made pieces for a sukkah last year but didn't assemble it. i hope it works out this year. i can cite a couple flaws in my plan but. what can i say. i was manic


meth is a rampant problem in the mountain west. its pandemic nature makes me feel really proud of individuals i meet who have scars from picking ( they're very distinctive ) & no recent sores. that's so powerful. i'm rooting for them, & also people beginning their recovery, & also those who aren't ready yet

ph, mh ( ~ ) 

still not well. but definitely feeling better than yesterday. using my executive functioning to clear tasks off my desk


the facts that our economy is buckling, rights are evaporating, & our chief executive has aspirations toward an authoritarian reign for life ... this tells me that we're a developing country & not a world power. a has-been nation state

( ph health, ~ ) 

@geske also the trans bit went very smoothly. we briefly went over what i have & what i use them for. the staff was genuinely more concerned abt the regularity of my bowels

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( ph health, ~ ) 

i went to an urgent care today bc i was in so much pain & they confirmed i probably have a kidney infection, possibly even a stone. i got a shot of antibiotics in my butt cheek & pick up the oral script in the morning. so. my self-diagnosis was right & my doctor ought to listen to me


my state has 4 all-or-nothing electoral votes. they're going to Trump. nothing i can do will change this. nothing whatsoever. voting anything but Trump is so meaningless in my state, i feel empowered to vote Bernie. & i will. bc it doesn't fucking matter in this clown race


i bumped my immunized shoulder coming up the stairs & complained "ow, my pneumonia" -- my jewmate prodded me in the chest & declared "PUT SOME ICE ON IT." i said, "no, it's fine," he said, "PUT SOME ICE ON IT." i said, "are you being dominant ? because that's arousing for me." he left me alone

@MoMartin to your point. i went shopping for new pants today & fully 2 separate individuals asked me if i was A) jewish & B) part of chabad ( here, rabbi mendel's flock ). neither of them seemed to be aware of the reform / conservative synagogue at all.

personal, not bragging, but yes excited 

yesterday i got to see my favorite band play a full set right in front of me in a recording studio, just 15 feet away. i was the entire audience of people who were not working. i got a private show. it was amazing & i should have thought to take my record for them to sign

MH ( ~ ) 

i've come to a place where i don't hate my rapists & abusers. i don't forgive them either. but i have understanding for their holding flawed worldviews & their subsequent actions. for me, that's progress

on g-d. of all the mistakes i can make in life at least i'll never be tempted by race-faking 🙄 these academics need to QUIT ( & thankfully more & more are coming out & resigning )

goopy ( not gwyneth paltrow ) 

my crush's doll collection hobby has me wanting to pick the perfect kens and barbies for which to sew different modern & traditional jewish dress

gross, judgmental i guess 

i do NOT understand my partner & his boyfriend. they'll put a towel in the laundry for me to wash after 1 use, but they only change their sheets 2-4 times a year ? like ? 😷

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